How often might you “tip- toe” around a subject because you are protecting someone’s feelings? You might elude to the true meaning of something but shy away out of fear of upsetting the other person. This can look like many different things. It can look like saying, “nothing,” when someone asks, “What is wrong?”. It can look like saying something, “isn’t a big deal,” even if it is. Vague communication leaves people wondering and having to connect the pieces in their own mind. Very often they are wrong in their connecting of the dots. There is kindness in clarity.
Clear communication. What does that mean to you? Does it mean having uncomfortable conversations with others? Does it mean being explicit about your expectations from someone or for someone? Does it mean communicating your boundaries even when the other party might not understand? What stops you from communicating clearly with others?
By communicating clearly, it takes away the guessing that the other person engages in. It takes away the mind reading that we tend to do when we do not know what another person wants from us. It reduces the overall anxiety in a relationship and builds trust in the reliability of the other person. Very often that is why we might “tip-toe”. We do not trust that the other person will hear our need and respond in a way that builds trust rather than rupture the relationship.
In order to build trusting relationships with open communication, we need to know that it is safe enough to feel vulnerable in a relationship. What might you need to see in your relationship with another to know that it is safe to be clear and vulnerable? Perhaps, this sounds a little something like consistency, time, understanding, decreased reactivity, and reliability. Are these things that you consistently put into the relationship as well? If not, what might you need to be able to give these factors to your relationship on a consistent basis.
There is clarity in kindness. However, in order to reach a state of clarity and openness, it must first be okay to be vulnerable with our clarity. Ask yourself what your relationships need to be able to support the level of vulnerability that exists in clear communication. Start to build that foundation intentionally and see where it leads. Happy Sunday! I hope a beautiful week awaits you.
Mind-Body-Connection 