Self-care

What does self-care mean to you?

I like to think of self-care as building a life that I do not need a break from. This means a life where I feel able to handle my day and engage with others in a meaningful way. Some days this means I need to take time for myself to be able to do that. Other days, it means I need to socialize more with friends. However, most days, it means I need rituals and routines that support the type of life that I want to live.

Self-care is not something that I do once in a while. Self-care is not indulging in life. Self-care is scheduling time for the things that I need to get done and making it a priority. This is something that takes place every day. There is self-care in our daily choices. These daily choices add up to our habits and the way that we live our lives. Self-care is making choices throughout our day that support ourselves.

This looks different for different people and at different times in our lives. One day it may look like taking space from a relationship to gather your thoughts and another day it may look like having a really challenging conversation that, while uncomfortable, will further your relationship and help you to understand yourself and the other person on a deeper level. One day it may look like pushing through your work and holding yourself accountable and the next day it may look like setting appropriate limits for yourself and taking a break when you feel drained. It all depends on knowing yourself and acknowledging your needs in that moment. What kind of life are you wanting to live that is sustainable?

The key word is sustainable. Are you creating habits and thus a life that sustains you and that you can sustain? Life is not a sprint. You need energy to get through and sometimes that means preventative care, habits, routines and listening to our bodies in order to know what we need to keep going in the way that we desire. This does not always mean being lax, sometimes this means pushing through so that we make our lives easier in the long run. Sometimes, it means doing the prep work to set ourselves up for success.

I want you to think of the most stressful areas of your life. The morning rush before work, sitting in traffic, perhaps, parenting with your significant other or co-parent. Now ask yourself this, “How do my habits and routines support this stressful time?”  Take the time to explore that answer and see what the need is in those areas. Do you more energy? Do you need more sleep? Do you need to be more prepared? What exactly is it that you need? Once you identify the need, you are able to add a small thing to your routine that supports that need. Slowly, over time, you start to build those habits that support you. Over time, you start to build a life that is founded in choices reflecting your self-care rather than escaping life for self-care. Share your thoughts down below! What does self-care mean to you?